Revision on the aspects of life...- Dreams...

There has been a lot on my mind lately as well as several matters weighing on me... came across many visuals...i can't really say they are visuals... but.. seeing those stuffs.. really made me put on my thinking cap...

Life revolves around work.. gym.. weigh loss stuffs... home.. the usual stuffs.. once home.. i would face my comp.. as usual.. check on Kellie.. ensuring she not in her teary moods.. I can fully understand how she feels..the only difference that's she's in London.. while I'm in Singapore..

Ironically, the feeling is quite there.. Even I have friends around me, relatives & close friends... the platform to stand & stay on, called reliability, it's presence is simply missing.. not reliability in the sense of business.. trust.. I think is more like.. the feeling of you know that when you need a shoulder to cry on.. there is someone you can turn to.. someone for you to hug when you needed one.. someone whom you can easily tell your fears.. sadness..weeping sorrows.. I realised.. i do not seems to be able to find any..even though they are around me..

They are so close.. yet.. too far away to be reached out to..

When was the last time i hug someone? months ago.. it was Sunand.. but the hug was a restrained one.. as well as a goodbye (Long time friend... whose leaving for Aussie & hard to meet up as well!!!) .

Why restrained.. I can't answer that.. hugging someone even not very close wasn't hard for me many years ago... But it seemed so hard now.. even if FT had asked for a friendly hug on a few occasions.. i flatly refuse.. it's not that i suspect he's not up to any good..

With him around me, i feel somewhat safe.. not that I have something for him.. it's just that the trust in him i can't find it on any other guys....that I know even if I lay next to him nude, nothing would happened & I could still slumber safely without any worries...Maybe it's becos he's GAY..LOL

A weird feeling washed up to me this morning... really weird..the feeling of missing Ft & wanting to Hug him woke me up.. This came up to me very clearly cut... the kind of hug is like I wanted to flung my arms over his shoulders & cling on tightly... & cry.. I do not know what came over me.. the feeling is just there...

Maybe I just had too much weird dreams recently..a couple too many....

Funny part is in all my dreams... i was slim.. Prophecies??

the first was on a Thursday or Wednesday i suppose..
I dreamt was engaged to this new guy(some local celebrity..not even acquaintance) i like recently.. & before me he had this really fabulous.. hot..model gf..whom he dumped to marry me..WOW RIGHT.. far-fetched dreams are like this.. that's why they are called dreams.... Hahaaaaa

I was the kinda jittery bride in the dream cos i have been hearing from many of our friends they are still somewhat together.. just that no strings attached.. it's just occasional companions.. & He still hangs out pretty much over her place overnight despite the fact we are getting married..VERY SOON in the dream..lol ..

I was like a teary fiancée whose totally lacked of self-confidence that could keep her man... I drove a sport car to meet him to have a talk & have half the mind to call off the engagement.. at the same time hopefully he would do something drastic to made me change my mind...Think he took over the wheel & as he was driving..the conversation goes

Me (teary..& choked emtions betrayed by my voice) : Why did you break up with her to be with me?
Silence...................
Him : Why don't you asked me why did i asked to marry you........

& THEN I WAS WOKE UP BY THE ALARM CLOCK!!!!! ( I think...LOL)

GAWD!!!!! Orgasm right!!! when the important part is coming to.. I was forced to awake...SIGHZZZ
This dream has not been continued since then.. LOL

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This Morning's was even weird.... I dreamt that 3 of my friends concurrently were trying to win a bet on me..however, i can recall only 1 of the incdent now..

3rd Dream :-
A long time brother cum friend( i remember whose he)...suddenly asked me out.. & he rides a bike.. (not so him... he was never into bike at all)
But somehow or rather he asked me out on a date... to stroll along Vivocity... funny dream...stroll at the park facing sentosa...

Another weird part is that pillion is usually sitting behind the rider... He told me to sit at the front while he sits behind me controlling the bike.. as we travel... weird.. it's like as if we were so close to a certain proximity

then somehow or rather he was trying to persuade me to go to this building just next to Vivo...the one that has a rotating tower ...but in the dream.. that place is a HOTEL! he was like half dragging me to it & i seem reluctant to advance towards it & mention i left my purse at his vehicle..& quickly u-turned...

He caught up with me & walked together.

As we walked out... he apologised.. He confessed that he had a bet with 2 of our friends that he was able to bed me..

This horrible dream really strikes me awake!!!! scary...

The other 2 i can't recall... & I'm worried.. cos they said if you dun remember your dreams details but you know you dreamt of it.. it would happened.. which means the other 2 might really happened!!!


Weird Dreams right....SIGHZZzzzz..

The Night's damned hot.. going off for a shower..

There are still so much more to blog abt...