i should not have come home this early

It's was half past six when i looked at my workdesk clock... drats.. i dun wish to go home this early.

It's not fear.. it's just the blardie slut back at the house that i dunche wish to see cuZ it would surely end up me being pissed upon see her dare-u-come-slap-me fuck face.

True enuff, the moment i open the door, it was dark & the lights from the corridor cast its glitters on dining table laden with feast... too bad.. I'm not the little match gal from the fable tales..

In fact i was irked by the smell that sprang & bang right into my skin. CURRY.. freaking unhealthy,,, i hope she choked on her cooking or even end up having runs after comsumption. or even grow FAT & die FAT

from her room, out she came, as if i'm Gonna GOBBLe down her Cooking, she dsashed into the Kitchen to get the containers to keep the food.. & at the same time delibrately bang the containers on the table to show her discontent to me.

Imeediately went into my room & bang the door without casting an glance at her... form the commotion in the hall, she switched on the telly to catch the local free to air channel..Wadeva,, she can watch it all she wants & i'm not going to unlocked the scv channels.

I'm contemplating to d/c scv totally. i really need to move out by December.. Geraldine is right.. b4 i drive her nuts.. she has already driven me crazy..pissed..

Why are some mummies lydat.. what the fuck are they thinking up there? they treasure being fucked by cocks more than they value their flesh & blood. Gaw darn it.. i envy those sweet mummies.. which most of my friends has.

I saw my colleague's sweetness to her dotter.. WAd DUh!.. why mine is like Half-Fuck-Rotten.

Now in my room.. the headache is building up.. i am just so pissed.. Geraldine was trying to cheer me up on msn with dumb chinese proverb.. which i totally am DUH to them...she end being scolded by me... but i really do appreciate her crappiness to cheer me up. I blurted out to Sunand in a fit of exasperation to find a nice old dying man to marry me to bring me out of this SHITHOLE *Sighz*

all i know now.. i'm so fuming that my body is burning up & my skin feels scorching hot.

My only worry now.. is Sushi.. my aunt asked why do u want a dog? why not just use that amount of money you have used on your dog 7 used it on me..would'nt it be better

I dun blame her.. the women from the maternal side has no loving heart for animals. cos they have fear in them.

she doesn't know that Daddy is indirectly the reason to keeping Sushi with me.. I've lost girlgirl thanks to that fucking-cheesepie-smelly-numerous-fucked slut

I've only Sushi left in memory to Daddy.

In this world.. no one sees what i am seeing.. feels what i am feeling.. understands what i'm understanding..cried for what i have cried for..I'm alone . yes. that's true. I may have friends. but friends will always be friends..they will only listen.. not it just isn't the same like having Daddy ard.

I'm nv happy in this house.. not home.. I've no home since 1996.. the year daddy left. the very day home has came crashing down & in its place..it's just a battle field worst than war ..& there is only victim.. the 16 yr old me struggling to grow up to be tough & head-strong.

What would be me now..if that slut died instead.. i believe..things would be much different. I would get the father love i yearn for.......& not the me today...